My Appeal to Teens and Parents of Today
I want to share how my parents dealt with it when I started to show signs of angst and frustration against them and how Jesus played a pivotal role in changing my attitude and perspective on my parents.
Today, I realized the magnitude of dealing with problems in the home especially concerning children but more specifically teenagers who are starting to be exposed to the reality that the world is a very menacing place filled with vices, distractions, addictions, and all sorts of bad influences that dissuade them from making prudent judgments in taking the right course of action.
I am shocked after reading the news that a 17-year-old teenager beat his grandmother to death after being scolded by her when she fetched him from the computer shop.
One tidbit that I am currently taking notice is that the boy was playing the popular game, Defense of the Ancients or DOTA for short. Taking everything else into consideration - the boy was born to a broken family, his parents practically had families of their own and so the teen was taken care of by his grandmother who often scolded him.
In this situation, I cannot blame either of them for what happened because I believe this was a buildup of problems and issues that compounded on each other and never really resolved until the boy snapped in the end.
I wish it could not have ended the way it did but placed under so much trauma, pressure, and stress without any support or genuine concern from anyone would take its toll on any person much less a teenager who needs somebody to guide him and to care for him.
The lack of parental guidance and concern from his relative worsened the condition of the boy, and perhaps along with the presence of bad company, spelled havoc for the hapless teen.
I also had a long personal conversation with one of my friends who has confided in me certain issues that he faces each day and how he felt broken and defeated after all the struggles that he has tried to deal with.
Ever since high school, he always felt left out and misunderstood by the people around him and he only wanted someone to understand his situation.
I believe that this is exactly what teenagers need especially as they go through the different processes of life - to have someone to shed light and give wisdom to them, someone who cares for them and has their best interest in mind.
When he was talking to me about his experiences early this year, I remembered the issues he told me in the past and I somewhat knew that his problems stem from the issues that happen in his family. In the end, he realized what his problem was and he confirmed my initial thoughts that it concerns his family.
I can definitely identify with these situations because before I had resolved my own inner struggles and issues with my family, I experienced the same feeling every day - the feeling of frustration, brokenness, and loneliness.
The feeling that nobody understands or tries to understand you; the feeling that you are alone facing this cruel world that we live in.
But I soon came to realize that my parents do love me and that they do care for me. I threw away the negative thoughts and feelings that I had about them when I met Jesus and received Him as my Lord and Savior.
It was a slow process but I was open to change because I wanted to have a better relationship with my parents. I was tired of holding frustration or anger against them because that simply sucked the life out of me and I could not live with a black hole in my heart.
I wanted to be at peace with my parents and to have the same kind of joy I had when I was young and in my naivete and innocence, I harbored no hard feelings for them because I knew then that they disciplined me because they love me and they wanted me to live the best kind of life - the life of righteousness with a deep devotion in seeking God and following Christ.
I knew that I had to give up certain bad influences, mostly video games, that dragged me out of the path that I wanted to walk in so I slowly purged the stronghold of these influences and addictions with the help of Jesus, the power of the Holy Spirit, and the grace of God because let us face it, we have no power on our own to overcome these problems and to change ourselves, no matter how hard we try.
We simply cannot do it alone and that is why need God and people who genuinely love us so that they can support us and mentor us along the way. That is why I urge anyone who holds a grudge or has any frustration with their children or with their parent to reconcile.
Ask Jesus to help you to find a way or an opportunity to apologize and to make right with them because if you don't, it may be too late when you finally realize your mistake and find the courage to correct it.
I am grateful because I have been changed by God in this aspect of my life and my parents fully support me and I never allow bad thoughts about them to creep into my mind.
I also try to control my mouth and tongue and my manner of speaking when talking with my parents so that I would not disrespect them in any way.
I believe that it is necessary for us to give attention to these issues because the home is where training and preparation for the real world starts and our character is developed in the home. The family is the fundamental unit of society and it is what builds up the society.
Our parents should be our model in life and source of wisdom and guidance. Parents, you have a responsibility and accountability before God to lead your children to the righteous way just as the Father in heaven leads His children to the right path and takes care of them, disciplining them when they disobey or sin, all because He loves His children; He loves us.
God the Father also protects His family and so we too need to be vigilant so as not to allow the enemy or Satan to camp in our household.
We should never allow him to have a grip or a stronghold over any member of the family because if he succeeds at destroying the bonds within the family, then there will be massive consequences on our posterity.
Parents should monitor what their children do and take immediate action when you know that your children are falling into bad influences or to any addictions. Children should listen to their parents and follow their commands and advice because your life depends on it.
I made some wrong decisions in my life and I did some wrong stuff that slowly consumed my inner peace and almost devastated my relationship with my parents but thanks be to God because He did not allow it to reach that point of no return.
My mother played such a pivotal role on pulling me back into righteousness and living a full life in Christ. She was the one whom the Holy Spirit spoke to and because of her sensitivity to the Spirit concerning my condition, she found out what I did when no one was around.
When she confronted me, I broke down to tears because I never thought I would get caught nor did I know how much God truly cares about me and how much He knows and see what I do when no other eyes can see.
Truly, I am thankful for that because it was from then on that I started to retrace the steps of my faith and even to go deeper into my understanding of God and in my relationship with Him.
Of course, the change did not happen overnight but when I finally accepted Christ into my life, I noticed things were different and I did not feel the heaviness of the burden that I used to carry because Jesus is now carrying it for me.
I stopped doing what I did and I stopped ignoring my parents as a form of rebellion or disrespect and I became more positive in life.
I do not know how much people can relate to this but I hope that you would make the right decision to want to change your life and to want to have your relationship with your parents or your children restored.
I encourage everyone to dig deep and humble ourselves before God so that He can change us and help us with our family problems and our personal problems because I believe that before we can change the people around us, we first need to change ourselves and how we relate with others especially our family.
It all starts in the home. God Bless!
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